“But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere” James 3:17, New Living Translation (NLT).
There are some who won’t bother telling a business about their bad service when they don’t plan to come back. They keep the feedback to themselves and move on to another company that can give them the quality service they deserve.
Similarly, when it comes to relationships, we don’t bother being truthful when we don’t plan to come back to someone. We are only truthful with those we deem as worth hearing it, and vulnerable in relationships we find irreplaceable.
Intimacy is produced when you become vulnerable enough to tell someone, “What you did hurt me”, “What you said hurt me”, “I’m guarded with you because your actions gave me pause”. And to be quite frank, some people would rather you call them a jerk rather than have you remain silent and go about your life as if they don’t matter.
On the opposite end of the spectrum, anytime you want a relationship so badly that you bypass hurtful things done to you because you don’t want to lose the relationship, this is not good.
It is good to understand God’s heart on this subject. God longs for a deeper relationship with us, so He is constantly revealing to us how He feels, what He likes and dislikes. He is not afraid of vulnerability, nor should we be afraid. We are to be imitators of God. Maybe you’re afraid of someone getting the wrong impression. There’s nothing wrong with saying, “I’m only sharing the truth with you because I care, but I’m not interested in a relationship.”
Be sincere. Be truthful. Be wise.
Prayer: Father God, thank You for speaking to my heart. I ask that You heal my heart of all wounds and help me become vulnerable enough to let people know how I really feel. Everyone is special in Your eyes, so everyone is worth hearing the truth. Help me to treat people right and glorify You in all I do. In Jesus’ name, Amen.