Miss Carriage

Posted on Posted in devotions

I met her sometime ago
she wasn’t so nice
hurt me indescribably
moreso emotionally
and I wept
from emptiness I felt
that ol’ Miss Carriage
disappointed me so
showed me
a blank screen
of where it used to be
where’s my baby Miss Carriage?
I desperately want to know
don’t want to hear she’s in heaven
just want to see her grow
living inside of me
breathing
leave me and just let me be
I’ll let my imagination comfort me
what might she have been
what might I have felt
upon first glance
of her
would she have been my twin
what might we have loved
and done
together
can’t wait to see her in heaven
can’t wait
to see her
in heaven

“Unless Your law had been my delight, I would have perished in my affliction.” Psalms 119:92 (AMP)

Things happen in our lives for which we have no explanation. When I had a miscarriage I could have become angry and bitter or I could’ve continued to trust God even though I didn’t understand why. With God’s grace, I chose to trust Him. There was a woman who became pregnant at the same time I did. Her baby went full term and lived.  I got to see her as she sat there dressed in her lace. Napping and looking adorable. Within myself I asked, “Why God?” But in the midst of my heartache, Holy Spirit reminded that God is good even when life isn’t. Nothing changes His character or His nature.

You may have cried enough tears to fill an ocean and you may be wondering, “Why God? I’ve served You faithfully.” It doesn’t always feel good to surrender our all to Him, especially in the bad times. But we do. Even though you don’t understand why, trust God anyway. You can’t give up when you still have a purpose to fulfill. Let God allow you to see your life from His perspective and you’ll see how every experience you’ve gone through fits perfectly into the grand scheme of God’s purpose and plan for your life.

Prayer: Father God, I don’t understand with my mind anything, but my heart knows that You are true and that You are good. Hold my hand and lead me through every pain and every struggle. Through every trial into my expected end. I believe You will not let the enemy have the last laugh in my life. From everything I have experienced, make it all worth it. Make it all worth it for Your glory! Be glorified in my life and cause every sorrow to be turned into incredible joy! In Jesus name, Amen.

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